You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
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