Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Randomize
