Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Let's paint friendship bongs
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
