I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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