Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
I'm too high and old for this...
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
