I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
You may now shotgun with the bride
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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