HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Randomize
