are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
