So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
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