is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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