I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Randomize
