It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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