You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I'm like, not good at living.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize
