Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize