i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Randomize