I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Randomize
