Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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