New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize
