I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
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