her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
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