I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
so explain again why im purple
no
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize