I can't watch pbs sober anymore
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
