lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
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