This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
Did we literally take a cab across the street
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Randomize
