you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
