Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize
