Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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