ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
Randomize
