More tranny stories later!
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
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