knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
