He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Randomize