Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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