theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
