I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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