I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
He? As in you personified your dick?
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
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