I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
