i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize