I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
And then my night got REAL pukey
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize