Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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