he wants to bone in the snuggie
So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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