im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
send nudes
from the living room?
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
