...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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