I cheated on you last night. I slept with my laptop.
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
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