i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
