"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize