A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
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