Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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