My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize