I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
