Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
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