if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
