I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize