lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize
